10 Bleak Yet Hilarious Affirmations to Get You Through Spring

Published on 14 March 2025 at 14:43

Spring is here! The days are getting longer, the flowers are blooming, and the birds are singing... but let’s be real—the sunshine won't quite balance out those seasonal allergies. Here are 10 Beaks and Bleakness affirmations to get you through to the summer.

1. You were made to fly ... but nobody told the wind

You’re trying your best, but the universe has other plans. Mostly unhelpful ones.

Bird: Great Crested Grebe (youngling)

2. You are soaring high ... just not in the right direction

Look at you go! No idea if it’s the right way, but hey, movement is progress. Right?

Bird: Eurasian Spoonbill

3. Every journey begins with a single step ... in the direction of avoiding responsibility

Off to great things! Or just away from them. Same difference.

Bird: Purple Sandpiper

4. Joy is all around you ... but so is existential dread

Spring is about balance. A little bit of sunshine, intermixed with the unexpected shower of spiraling thoughts.

Bird: Spotted Redshank

5. The world is your oyster ... but you are allergic to shellfish

Opportunity knocks, but so does irony.

Bird: Ruddy Turnstone

6. Reach for the stars ... but you'll probably hit a powerline

Swing big, but maybe also check your surroundings first.

Bird: Lapwing

7. You are as free as the wind ... aimless, and all over the place

No plan? No problem. Just go wherever life chaotically pushes you.

Bird: Egret

8. Every option feels wrong ... so you'll keep hovering over them forever

Decisions are exhausting, so you've decided to never escape this exhaustion. At least that's a decision.

Bird: Western Marsh Harrier (female)

9. Sing your song ... and hope someone finds it tolerable

Express yourself! Accept yourself! And hope that the world will too.

Bird: Eurasian Wren

10. You thought you were making waves ... but they were just ripples in a shallow pond

Your impact is undeniable. It’s just... small. Maybe even inconsequential.

Bird: Green Sandpiper

Want More Bleak but Hilarious Affirmations?

If you related to these, follow Beaks and Bleakness on Instagram for more doses of realism, paired with beautiful bird photos captured by yours truly.